Mommy's Mumblings

Murphy's Law

2011-08-10T00:15:00.000-05:00

For the first time in months I wrote something here - nothing mind boggling, buts sincere and honest and what happened? POOF just like that, because of a slip of the finger, it vanished.

*sigh*

Maybe tomorrow I will try again.

~lisa

-Waiting–Patience–Quiet– -Listening--Hearing -

2011-02-10T14:01:00.000-06:00

I once read a book titled, “I’m Tired of Waiting” – patience has never been one of my stronger points – waiting is necessary, I get that. And I have become much more patient over the years. Then you throw in that little bit about waiting quietly – QUIETLY??? OH MAN, now that is a tall order! OK so waiting quietly.
BUT – at the same time, while we are waiting we are NOT to sit around doing nothing – we are NOT to be lazy. So what are we to do while we wait?
And, if we have door opening does that necessarily mean that that is the path God wants us to take? How do we know?
In the end, maybe my overtime functioning analytical brain needs to take a break.
But the reality of who I am means I will still be saying

HOW DO WE KNOW???

Proverbs 19:11
A person’s wisdom yields patience; it is to one’s glory to overlook an offense.
Romans 2:4
Or do you show contempt for the riches of his kindness, forbearance and patience, not realizing that God’s kindness is intended to lead you to repentance?
Romans 9:22
What if God, although choosing to show his wrath and make his power known, bore with great patience the objects of his wrath—prepared for destruction?
Colossians 1:11
being strengthened with all power according to his glorious might so that you may have great endurance and patience,
1 Timothy 1:16
But for that very reason I was shown mercy so that in me, the worst of sinners, Christ Jesus might display his immense patience as an example for those who would believe in him and receive eternal life.
James 5:7
[ Patience in Suffering ] Be patient, then, brothers and sisters, until the Lord’s coming. See how the farmer waits for the land to yield its valuable crop, patiently waiting for the autumn and spring rains.
Numbers 9:8
Moses answered them, “Wait until I find out what the LORD commands concerning you.”
1 Samuel 14:9
If they say to us, ‘Wait there until we come to you,’ we will stay where we are and not go up to them.
2 Samuel 15:28
I will wait at the fords in the wilderness until word comes from you to inform me.”
Job 29:21
“People listened to me expectantly, waiting in silence for my counsel.
Job 32:16
Must I wait, now that they are silent, now that they stand there with no reply?
Psalm 5:3
In the morning, LORD, you hear my voice; in the morning I lay my requests before you and wait expectantly.
Psalm 27:14
Wait for the LORD; be strong and take heart and wait for the LORD.
Psalm 33:20
We wait in hope for the LORD; he is our help and our shield.
Psalm 37:7
Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him; do not fret when people succeed in their ways, when they carry out their wicked schemes.
Psalm 38:15
LORD, I wait for you; you will answer, Lord my God.
Psalm 119:166
I wait for your salvation, LORD, and I follow your commands.
Lamentations 3:24
I say to myself, “The LORD is my portion; therefore I will wait for him.”
Lamentations 3:26
it is good to wait quietly for the salvation of the LORD.
Micah 7:7
But as for me, I watch in hope for the LORD, I wait for God my Savior; my God will hear me.
Romans 8:25
But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently.
1 Corinthians 1:7
Therefore you do not lack any spiritual gift as you eagerly wait for our Lord Jesus Christ to be revealed.
1 Corinthians 4:5
Therefore judge nothing before the appointed time; wait until the Lord comes. He will bring to light what is hidden in darkness and will expose the motives of the heart. At that time each will receive their praise from God.
Hebrews 6:15
And so after waiting patiently, Abraham received what was promised.
Psalm 40:1
[ Psalm 40 ] For the director of music. Of David. A psalm. I waited patiently for the LORD; he turned to me and heard my cry.
Hebrews 6:12
We do not want you to become lazy, but to imitate those who through faith and patience inherit what has been promised.

Climbing Out…..and Up

2010-11-06T23:24:00.000-05:00

To say it has been an interesting week would be a great understatement. I have had the very humbling, exciting and awesome honor of being used as an instrument of God. And in that a new life has come into the family of Christ! How that all unfolded is a great story in itself, but it is not the one I feel I am to tell right now.
No, the story I am about to tell, is the less “fun” part of the week. It started Tuesday morning when I had what I thought was a brief allergy attacking…you know, the kind when you sneeze like a gazillion times over. As the day went on it became clear that it was more than allergies, it was a cold. Let me pause here to say, I NEVER get sick, like seriously, never! So I was terribly aggravated. I still went to rehearsal (at that point I was still blaming allergies) but my 8:00pm I was done….Ka-put….in bed, down and out.
One slight hitch….I could breathe or get comfortable. It was constantly one extreme or the other – totally stuffed up or non-stop dripping (to which I determined even the softest tissues cease to be soft when you use them non-stop that long).
Wednesday came and mid-morning I noticed my neck and shoulder were sore. I thought, “Oh great, this cold is settling in my neck, yuck.” I pleaded with time to go faster so the kids and I could make it to nap time and FINALLY it came. And bless their dear little hearts, all three of them must have sensed what Mommy needed and they all napped at the same time. So I did something I very rarely do, I laid down to nap too, thinking I would wake up feeling a lot better and thankful I did not have rehearsal. When Jalissa arrived home from school, she woke me up (yes, we had all been sleeping for a good two hours!). But OIY, I could hardly move….and I mean hardly. I could not pick up Cael, I could not fix my pony tail, even having my arm hanging by my side hurt. I am so thankful for a flexible chiropractor that when I called, said, “Come right over” and it is only 3 blocks away!
You know it is not good when the chiropractor checks you out and three times before he adjusts anything he says, “You are going to hate me for this.” Half in jest, but half serious. Usually a good adjustment will do the trick and I thought since I was not stubborn trying to wait until the next day and came right in I would be in good shape. Nope, had to have an ultrasound too. Then he scheduled me for again the next day. And I was back again on Friday.
Bless my dear husband, he handled all the Wednesday night activities, including taking baby Cael with him to Vital Men and let me stay home (there was no way I could handle going to my class). My cold was on the upswing so I was hopeful I was on the mend all together.
Thursday was a little better, but still not functioning 100%. But that is when it hit me. The devil is madder than a messed with hornet’s nest. He is MAD because there is a new life in the family of Christ, and I played a part in that! Smartie me thought that realization would make things back off and life settle down. HA, not so, the devil just started in double, even triple time. Attack after attack after attack came, especially Friday. And this time they were attacks of the mind, emotions and spirit. Did not seem to slow him down that I knew what they were. And honestly, by the end of last night, I was just D – O – N – E!
I thought about going back to school late in the evening to paint set --- sometimes doing that alone late at night is good for me. As time went on I found myself, shoes kicked off, ponytail out, coat still on sitting criss-cross applesauce on our kitchen counter. And then Jeff came in and we started to talk. Not about the events and attacks, about God, about the Bible, about life (the bigger picture)….and I realized I was done for the night. Sometimes you just have to chalk the day up and look forward to the next one being a new day, a new opportunity.
Then early into today there was a sour note hit. And wham, whoops, slipsy, daisy, down, splat. And just like that, I once again realize the battle is real and it is totally on for another day. Have I been victorious at every turn? Hardly. But I have had victory more times than not.
I also heard from God that He lifts me out of the mirey muck. And that prompted me to go find these verse(s):
“He lifted me out of the slimy pit, out of the mud and mire; he set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand.” Psalm 40:2
“Rescue me from the mire, do not let me sink; deliver me from those who hate me, from the deep waters.” Psalm 69:14
I have found comfort and reassurance. Not that the battles are over, but that God loves me enough that when I look up to Him, He will lift me out of the pit and place my feet on solid ground. I plan to keep my feet firmly planted and lean on the assurance that God will guide me along the way (and rescue me when I go wrong).
No matter what attack the devil may bring forth there is NO WAY I am going to stop doing what I am doing and NO WAY I would change what I have done that helped bring this dear young friend to the Lord. A life that was saved,

worth it –

                                         every –
                                                      single –
                                                                       time!

Grace

2010-11-04T16:18:00.000-05:00

But in your great mercy you did not put an end to them or abandon them, for you are a gracious and merciful God. (Nehemiah 9:31, NIV)

When I came across this verse several years ago, it quickly became my favorite...my life verse.

Many years ago when I was a freshman at Central College, I found myself in a most undesirable situation. I was pregnant and unmarried. I never, ever thought I would consider abortion. And even when the nurse called with test results, as scared as I was, abortion was not an option in my mind. But when I told my boyfriend his immediate reply was, "My dad is gonna kill me," and he saw abortion as the only option. In the face of a myriad of fears, I agreed to it.

Not only did I agree to it. I made the call to Planned Parenthood in Des Moines. They gave me option of two dates, February 14 and February 21. I remember saying, "WHO would do this on Valentine's Day?" I don't know if I said it out loud or in my head. But it is clear that I knew what I was making an appointment for was wrong.

Saturday morning, February 21, 1987 the skies were overcast and dreary gray. I thought how appropriate given what was going to happen.Another sign I knew what was happening was wrong. Dean picked me up early and we drove in virtual silence to Des Moines. I was sick to my stomach - likely a combination of morning sickness and anxiety.

I remember checking in, and paying half of the money. I remember talking to a counselor but feeling very trapped, feeling I had no options. I remember a nurse holding my hand during the 'procedure', patting me in a patronizing way saying, "You are doing great." As tears streamed down my cheeks they were sucking my baby from me. I thought, "How would you know how well I am doing?" I was mad! I was sad! It was too late! There was no backing out now.

That's all I remember until the ride home....when Dean was all happy go lucky, and decided we should stop to eat. At Perkins he ate while I stared out the window still feeling sick.

She had arm buds. She had leg buds. Her upper and lower jaws were already formed. She had eye spots. And she had a heart bulge. Yes, she.

Back at Central we went on as if nothing had ever happened. Well, at least on the outside we made it look that way. The next day we went to my young cousin's birthday party where I played and rough housed with the kids just like always. Monday began finals week so I crammed and studied and sailed through tests. Things were never the same between Dean and I, there was always a constant, unspoken tension. And I came to find out, I was not the first girl he had persuaded to have an abortion....the one before me had been pregnant with twins. It was over a year, including a rough semester abroad together, before I finally broke away for good. It was ugly.

It was after that (I think) that I began counseling.

I firmly believe that deep down within, every woman knows that what is within her is a growing, living baby.....not some glob of tissue. When a woman hears she is pregnant, she has a life time of dreams and wishes go through her mind for that child. And when that does not happen she grieves. And when it does not happen because of choices she makes, she not only grieves, but has to deal with the guilt.

But then there is GOD! He forgives ME no matter what! Even when I was part of something as terrible as abortion, He forgives ME!

God forgave me instead of giving me what I really deserve, which is death itself. And on top of that, He has bestowed on me the trust and incredible blessing of raising nine, NINE children with my husband. That is something I in no way, shape or form deserve.

His grace! His mercy!

The context of my favorite scripture above is people acting in sin, being warned, even blessed and protected by God, and yet still unwilling to turn from the sin and arrogance and did God ever turn away from them? NO --- -NEVER!

No matter how many times I foul up, no matter how many times you foul up....no matter how we foul up, the God of God, Lord of Lords, our Savior, our Creator, loves me, loves you, loves us and extends HIS grace and mercy, time after time after time.

This is my personal story, that happened right here in Pella. Does it apply to the bigger picture? Can I say that abortion should not be legal?

Yes and yes! If abortion had not been legal, it would not have been an option. Yes, there are some that will go to any ends, even risking back alley clinics, but that by and large is not the case. Also, if there had been a pregnancy care center here, someone to understand, care about me and walk with me, then I would have had the support to make better choices.

Abortion, even very early, not only kills a life, it also scars a woman emotionally, spiritually and physically. There is an increased risk of breast cancer later in life after an abortion. Emotionally she has to wrangle with the reality of what she has done. Spiritually it puts distance between her and God. Healing is possible in all of these, but it is never totally erased. And when we are living in a society that promotes and celebrates abortion, it is harder to seek healing because there is a pull of "I shouldn't really feel bad, why do I?"

Even pastors fear preaching about abortion. The reason I have always heard is, "there is likely a woman in my congregation that has gone through abortion and I don't want to make her feel bad." There is where I will challenge pastors that if this is their reasoning then they are falling short. Because what woman need to hear is that God forgives them, He offers them grace and mercy, he wants them to draw close to Him and be healed!

For along time I have held silent and let people think that I oppose abortion simply because I am "religious". No more. Here is my story, my true and painful story. My story of redemption. My story of a loving God who has extend His grace and mercy to me in a very personal way.

My story that ends with my comforting beautiful vision of my mother holding my precious baby Grace in heaven and my hope that one day I will be reunited with them both.

Keep It Simple

2010-11-01T07:00:00.000-05:00

God – the one and only true God, Lord of Lords, King of Kings, Maker of heaven and earth, He created the world and everything in it, He put order into place, and He sent His one and only Son to die on a cross.

WHY?

For me……for you……for everyone!

WHY?

Because we are all sinners. Can’t help it, born that way. Every day, no matter how hard I try I make more mistakes than you can shake a stick at. I lose my patience, I say an unkind word, I think worse thoughts, I sin.

So what?

So, God’s Son, Jesus was hung on the cross, crucified and died, laid there for three days and when the stone was rolled away, Jesus was not there! Why? Because He rose from the dead! Only by the power of God is that possible. All so that I….all so that you……all so that ANYONE who chooses can be saved from their sins.

Chooses?

Yep, my choice….your choice. Believe or not….but whether we believe or not does not change the truth. And the very fact that I have choices is why I constantly mess up and HE is there to catch me.

How?

Simply by praying….by talking to Him.

Lord, I know I am a sinner. I have broken your laws and I am sorry. I need you. Please forgive me. I believe Jesus is the son of God, that Jesus died on the cross and rose again to save me from my sins. Please come into my heart today. Change my heart, change my life. Be the Lord and ruler of my life. Guide me in all that I do from this day forward. Thank you Lord. AMEN.

That’s it…it really is that simple. You don’t have to read the Bible cover to cover and have it all figure out first, YOU JUST HAVE TO HAVE FAITH!!!!

OH, and I forgot

2010-10-31T17:45:00.002-05:00

Jalissa turned 17

and

Cael turned 1

I am still not sure which is more shocking!

Where Have I Been?

2010-10-31T17:37:00.000-05:00

Sometimes, life just gets so busy….
I often have something come to mind, some event happens, or just a funny little thing from every day life that I think “Oh, I should blog about this!” But then ….. well, life just happens and it is on to the next thing and time passes and I think the original thing is no longer relevant or important enough to blog about…and on and on and on the circle goes.
I miss writing….because it is something I really enjoy at the time, I enjoy making other people smile or think, and I like that I can go back later and see where life has taken me over time.
Some brief highlights on this last day of October, 2010:
* another school year started, with Jalissa and Caleb at Pella Christian High School; Cole, Jalayna, Jaden Joy, Chloe and Jarah at Peoria Christian School
*Firsts and lasts:

* This is the first year our children have been at Peoria Christian School
* This is Jarah’s first year of school as a Kindergartener – it is progressive Kindy so right now she goes 3 days a week and will progress to 5 days a week by the end of the year.
* Cole played on his first school teams for football and soccer
* Jalissa and Caleb no longer ride the bus, they drive.
* Caleb played in his first Varsity Football game, as a Sophomore
* Jalissa is in her first year of chapel planning committee, football photographer, and had her first college visit
* Jalissa had her last school picture (I don’t think she is sad about that, but it is the most beautiful school picture I have ever seen!)

* Last night Jalissa and Caleb finished a very successful run in PC’s Fall production of Disney’s popular “High School Musical”
* Jalayna is in the midst of rehearsals for Union Street Players
* I am directing the Jr Hi Play at Pella Christian Grade School (this is my 7th), but new factor is that I got the privilege of inviting students from all the area Christian Schools to audition (or be part of the behind the scenes crews).
* Our family, specifically our marriage, has been under serious attack for the better part of three years – finally, FINALLY we are finding some peace, common ground, joy and pleasure…in many new ways (ahhhhhh, a refreshing sigh). THAT, my friends is a real VITORY in JESUS!!!

Super Heroes

2010-09-08T21:21:00.001-05:00

Following Friday's football game, I had the following conversation with my 3 year-old son:

Mommy, "Johnson what did we do tonight?"
Johnson, "Went to the football game."
Mommy, "Why?"
Johnson, "To watch Caleb."
Mommy, "Caleb? Who's Caleb?"
Johnson, "He's my superhero."

Matter of fact, no hoopla, straight talk, BAM, there it is. To a 3 year-old boy, his 15 year-old brother is his super hero. After I got done chuckling at the cuteness of it, I thought, that is really how it should be.

This pondering did not end with that night. It has continued on as I consider things such as, what is a true super hero? Who are super heroes? Are there real life super heroes or are they all just fictional cartoon characters?

From the beginning of time, the word of God speaks of heroes. ".....They were the heroes of old, men of renown....." Genesis 6"4 (NIV) Heroes, "men of distinguished courage or ability, admired for their brave deeds and noble qualities." Renown, "widespread and high repute; fame." (www.dictionary.com)

Many young people look to sports stars or celebrities. But as we have seen time and time again, many of these people know little to nothing about courage, bravery, nobility or repute. They climb to fame on some skill, but underneath their character is lacking. Which really leads me to ask, how in the world do they end up as super heroes? Beyond that, it makes me question, where should young people be looking for super heroes?

When seriously considered, that question is quite difficult to answer. Because our world has deteriorated to a point we do not recognize, much less value true super heroes. In some cases, we are fortunate to have men in our lives, our immediate lives, who are true super heroes.

Men of character. Noble men. Brave men. Men courageous enough to stand against the tide of current societal values and strive for something of much higher value in the long run. Men who are courageous enough to really deal with the 'junk' in their life (current or past) and work toward something better.

And maybe, just maybe, my 3 year-old is more spot on that any of us realize. I hope my 15 year-old lives up to it.

"Dream Big, Act Now!"

2010-08-16T21:03:00.000-05:00

Dream Big, Act Now is the them of Kohl's Cares newest give away. And it is not a little give away. Oh no...it is $10 MILLION to 20 eligible school across the United States. That amounts to a cool HALF MILLION to each school!

Now Peoria Christian might be small, but I guarantee we can DREAM BIG!!! And a gift of this size would be huge to the programs and families that attend Peoria Christian.

We will have 5 of our children in attendance this year. It is a new school for us, but I assure you, we have embraced it whole heartedly and they are welcoming us with open arms.

How can you help? I thought you would never ask (~:

It is ever so simple. Just click on this little button and it will guide you right through. You can vote FIVE times - PLEASE HELP US!!!!

THANK YOU in advance for your help!!!!

My Boys

2010-08-15T22:33:00.001-05:00

There is something special about a Mommy and her boys, whether they are 15, 12, 3 or 9mo, they are special. Here are a few recent pictures of my beautiful boys.

"I quit"

2010-08-10T20:44:00.000-05:00

Johnson, our 3 year old boy, just said to his dad, "I quit reading the Bible." When Jeff questioned him as to why, Johnson's response was, "Because I don't want to!"

As this happened I had an "ah-ha" moment. Isn't Johnson clearly demonstrating our human nature? We always have a choice. But what Johnson has yet to understand is that with EVERY choice there is a consequence (sometimes good, sometimes not so good).

For that matter, I often think there are a lot of adults that have yet to understand that to every choice there is a consequence.

We live in a world of "me, Me, ME!" Get what I want and get it now. Do what's best for ME and don't worry about anyone else. What's right for me doesn't have to be right for you, just let me live my life and you live your's. Bigger is better. More is better. I can and must have it all and have it now.

If you listen to the messages of the world - coming at us faster and from more directions than ever - then it is no wonder we have a generation of people in debt beyond their eyeballs so much so that we have had an economic crisis for over a year now. An entire generation that believed that they were entitled to have everything their parents have, only they did not have to wait or work for it as long as their parents. "Hey, just sign here, then you can have all your parents had, have it now and pay for it later."

Somewhere along the line a whole lot of people missed the message that "YOU HAVE A CHOICE!" Oh sure, they raise a rucus about wanting a 'choice' in whether to give life to or abort a baby....oh but I digress, that's another post.....sorry.

The choice is to live according to the guidelines given to us by our loving, living God. Yes, it absolutely flies in the face of most everything the general society teaches. But it offers a security, a comfort, a peace that the world can not come anywhere close to.

God to gave us a choice......He gave us free will. And what's even better is that He knew we would mess it up - routinely, over and over again, in big and bad ways and yet He loves us and wants us to come to Him, repent of our wrong doings and be made whole again.

When it comes down to it, it is very simple.....so simple a 3 year old understands.

THIS is how!

2010-08-09T23:08:00.000-05:00

Earlier this evening I had a phone conversation with a dear sister in Christ. One whom I have not known a long time, but with whom I knew I had a kindred spirit within the first thirty seconds I ever spoke with her.

In our conversation tonight she asked me, "How do you do it?" The context for this question had to do with some current life circumstances and how do I stay upbeat and positive in the face of it. I was not sure how to answer her question........until.....

I read this little excerpt from Jan Silvious in A Grand New Day © 2008 by Thomas Nelson:
I have a sister-in-law who raises fainting goats. What a contrast they are to the little leaping lambs! These goats are slightly nasty and not very pretty. They meander about foraging for food until they are startled by life in the goat yard and then they just up and faint! They can’t stand to be startled, so they don’t take time to rejoice. They just faint to get away from reality. They are programmed to avoid dealing with it!
Humanly speaking, they are like women who refuse to face the truth. They don’t recognize that God is in control and in the situation that startled them. They just faint and go to La-la Land until the distress passes by. Of course, when they come to, the circumstances are still there. What good did their little escape do? The answer is none. Mature women know that no matter how much they might want to be like Scarlet O’Hara and deal with life’s realities tomorrow, that is no way to live.
No matter your circumstances, rejoice and rejoice again, because God is the author and finisher of life. He is in the middle of everything you face, no matter what. That’s worth knowing and holding on to.

And the question was posed, "Do you tend to be more of a leaping lamb or a fainting goat?"

I must disclose here that I am FAR from mature, but I have never been one to 'faint' or run away and hide from problems or challenges that arise.

God never promised us a bed of roses or an easy life. But He DOES promise that He is with us always. He will never leave nor forsake us. He will never leave or forsake ME. No matter what sins I have committed or how big and bad they may seem in the eyes of the world, God made me the person I am and He rejoices in ME. I am not defined by my circumstances, past or current. I am a child of the living Christ and that very fact gives me hope, promise and more than enough to rejoice about.

The world we are living in and raising our children in is by far the most difficult and challenging to date. But while the world keeps changing, God does NOT. HE is the same, yesterday, today and forever more.

And that, my dear friends, is how I do it.

Opening Night

2010-07-30T09:32:00.000-05:00

As I arose for the day I had a sense of anticipation, in spite of very little sleep because Cael fussed, fidgeted and screamed all night (and now I am not exaggerating, just ask Jeff). Anticipation because it was Opening Night!

The first round of auditions were held exactly eleven weeks ago to the day. I planned three nights of rehearsals each week. I was always constantly amazed how everyone came well prepared, worked diligently and we were very often done early.

We had all worked together as a team so well (some 70 people between cast and crew) that there was very little that there very few last minute things I needed to do:
* I borrowed a can of red spray paint from the backyard neighbor and waited as she nuked a corndog so I could have the stick out of it; apple + red spray paint + corndog stick = candied apple (~:
*Mrs. Arable and I planned to hit the consignment and thrift stores for a different pair of shoes for her (we found some on our FIRST stop!). A newcomer to the stage, she has been a great delight to work with, along with her two daughters, and I am certain our families were meant to connect.
* pick up cast/crew/helper gifts:

* stop in to order balloons for props and for my actor/actress children and a bouquet of flowers for my wonderful assistant director (Jalissa)
* 10 minute stress buster massage (THANKS Drew!)
* pick up balloons and flowers and head to Community Center
* tie tags on the gifts and lay out for everyone (THANKS Deb for coming to help!)
* stop to pick up Jalayna, Jaden Joy and Chloe from play date and end up visiting until a few minutes after 4
* home to get ready and gather things to take uptown
* 4:55 arrive at Community Center and begin pre-show preps (including attaching goose and gander tail feathers)

6:45 we all meet upstairs and as I walk in the small room overflowing with 60 cast members, it hits me how many people have been involved just in the cast. This is the FIRST time we have actually had EVERYONE together (someone was always gone for rehearsals). I look around the room, thinking I should come up with something incredibly inspirational to say. I give a few notes.

And then, we pray.

And head back downstairs. Some to their dressing rooms, some in position to start and crew all ready.

7pm the lights go up and the curtain opens on Opening Night. Within the first minutes of the play I am assured the audience is having a good time as they laugh and react at even the smallest details (YAH!).

In the headsets we all begin to chatter with a slight hint of panic as we realize with one wrong line the play was moved ahead a scene, missing one important part. My comment, "Well, let's see how they handle this." And with that "Charlotte" maintained the poise of a professional, improvised a way for the missing part to happen and the other actors went right along with her. In the headsets we all breathed a sigh of relief. Very few of the audience members even noticed. Intermission was filled with "Charlotte" being comended over and over for her great save!

Act 2 went off with just a few minor glitches and all too suddenly we were at curtain call. Putting some 60 people on the stage all at once with quite a sight!

In the reception line is where I get to see the delight, happiness, warmth and true enjoyment in the faces of the audience members. They LOVED it! My heart swells with pride. It was a good opening night!

An Impromptu Photo Session

2010-07-06T22:52:00.003-05:00

For some unknown reason, Jalayna decided to dress Johnson up a bit today. He was so 'stinking' cute that I just HAD to do a quick (well, everything with a three year old boy is quick) impromptu photo session. Following are some of the results:

I Love You Mom

Bigger is...........................Better?

2010-05-21T12:28:00.000-05:00

One Sunday when Jeff and I were hurrying through the grocery store in our "stop and run in quick" after church, I spotted these bags of marshmallows on one of the end caps. Not just any marshmallows - these are HUGE!

Last night Jeff took the Fab 4 (the 4 girls in the middle) to the store with him. Low and behold they came home with all the making for s'mores - including not one, but TWO bags of the GIANT "campfire" marshmallows.

Dinner ran late so we ran out of time (and were too stuffed) to do s'mores last night. But the kids were so very anxious to try these out that they begged to have hot chocolate and toast for breakfast this morning. Let me tell you, one of these giant marshmallows filled half the cup!

I posted a note on Facebook about them last night and of course, it brought all kinds of reactions, responses, and requests for pictures.

This morning and I was deciding how best to take a picture in order to accurately show the size, my mind whirled around this notion of 'bigger is better'. We live in a society of 'value meals', SUVs, and Super Center Discount stores. Let me take those one by one:
'value meals' - where you get more food for your 'buck' - while this may be true, it will also gain you more in your waistline and on your bathroom scales - not to mention the possibility of blocking your veins
SUVs - granted I drive a 15 passenger van out of necessity, but have you seen all the smaller families that are driving the enormous vehicles!?! So you get more space to spread out, but you also spend way more on gas, contribute lots more 'junk' to the atmosphere, spend more in taxes, insurance and registration/licensing fees, and take up a lot more space on the roads and in parking lots

Super Center Discount Stores - claim to be same quality products for better prices, and while that may be true in some instances, it certainly is not across the board. And then consider that unless you can incredibly strong focus and will to only get what you need or what's on your list, that often you end up popping one....or two.....or several more things into your cart and WHOA it helps their sales, but does it really help you?

On the flip side, we have all heard the old adage, "The best presents come in the smallest packages."

So where does this leave us? I am sure that we would all argue that neither statement is equivalently true 100% of the time.

Taking this one step farther. Sometimes Christ speaks to us (me) in BIG ways. Claps of thunder. Loud Christian worship songs.

This morning Christ has been speaking to me in this still, small voice. Barely a whisper. And what He is asking of me, is something I really, REALLY do NOT want to do.

He could yell at me and I could be downright defiant. But this time He is whispering and calling me into obedience. Oh yes, I still have the choice to be downright defiant, but somehow when He keeps whispering confirmation, reassurance and assurance, it seems a bit less 'painful' to do what He is asking me to.

Adventures in .......................... Laundry!

2010-05-16T22:24:00.000-05:00

Saturday morning I walked into the laundry room and went........

.......SQUISH................

not exactly the best way to be greeted first thing in the morning.

The squish was not because of a carpeted laundry room - it was because there was a good deal of dirty laundry on the floor..... WET! Add to that the fact, that I had a busy morning ahead with auditions for the local community theater Summer production, and, well, I was just hoping it was not an indicator of how the day ahead was going to be.

I grabbed five laundry baskets (truth be told, I dumped five baskets of clean laundry waiting to be folded onto the front room floor) and filled them with wet, wet laundry. By the time I was done with that I really needed to get headed uptown in order to be prepared for auditions, so for the time being they had to sit. Not the ideal situation, but it would have to do for the time being.

Auditions ended at noon, then I had to shut down lights and lock doors before I headed back home. When I got home, Caleb was almost ready to go to his baseball scrimmage and he picked that moment to decide the HAD to have cleats....so off to the sports store we went. What coulda/shoulda been a quick stop, turned into over half an hour because they had only one pair in his size and they were the most expensive ones, so they called around to their other stores to find the ones he wanted in his size (and a better price for Mom's sanity). Of course the sports store is on the complete opposite side of town from the high school - makes me glad we live in a relatively small town!

I should probably mention here that Jeff was gone to the neighboring town to umpire Little League baseball games, including on of Cole's and had take Johnson with him. Jalissa, the other legal driver in the house, was at work.

Back home again, just in enough time to get Jalayna and Jaden Joy ready to go to their softball practice. Then back home for NAP TIME!

Finally around 4:30, Jalayna and I scrounged up all the quarters and dollar bills we could find, loaded up the five baskets of wet laundry and headed three blocks to the laundromat. This was a new experience for Jalayna, so she was pretty intrigued and a great helper! We piled the washers full and realized we did not bring the laundry soap (good thing it is only three blocks). Home and back again, Jalayna enjoyed putting the dollars in the machine to get quarters and then putting the quarters in the washers and starting them.

We returned about 45 minutes later (yes the washers only take 23 minutes, but we did not make it back right away) to put them in dryers. We could not go back again until Jeff got home with some cash. When we were able to, Jaden Joy joined us start another four loads in washers and to pull everything out of the dryers (they were fascinated with the big wire baskets on rollers).

I started folding one big basket while Jaden Joy pulled put all socks into a small, home basket and Jalayna folded from the other big basket. I had to keep reminding them to stay on task and go quickly. In the end I finished my basket as the washers finished and I finished off the second basket as the girls switched the loads from washers to dryers.

I thought it was going to be wonderful to go home with everything folded and then simply have owners but their own away. Yeah, right, some of the piles are still waiting!

When we got back home, Jeff was finishing grilling a special late dinner for the two of us (it was our 17th wedding anniversary) and Cole greeted me in black shirt with a white cloth over his arm to ask what I wanted to drink.

Then the kids all disappeared into the front room where they closed the pocket doors and left Jeff and I alone at the kitchen island to enjoy our meal. OH and the little romantics even turned the lights down and had candles lit!

As time went on, one by one the children came and bid us good night before heading upstairs to bed. Shortly after 10, Jalissa and Caleb got home and I went to nurse Cael while Jeff and Caleb scooted over to grab the rest of the laundry. I guess they got there just in time because as they were inside the police came to lock up for the night!

Tomorrow I have to call and see if I can get someone to come look at the washer - the inside rubber is torn and I am sure the reason for the laundry room flood. That, and I now have to deal with Mt Neverrest (about 15 loads) of laundry that needs folded that has overtaken the front room floor.

A long day, nine loads, $28, new experiences and some special memories make for adventures in laundry!

Parent Moments

2010-05-06T08:41:00.000-05:00

As a mom of a large family I get the privilege of living some parent moments that a lot of parents never get. Before anyone with a smaller family gets their feathers ruffled, let me explain.

Tuesday was Jarah's birthday. Tuesdays are also pre-school days for Jarah. So it worked out perfect that Jarah was assigned her snack day on her birthday. Throughout the year, she was assigned four different snack days. On these days a parent, grandparent, special friend is to attend with the snack student to aid as an extra helper that day. I had done two of the days and Jeff one. All year, Jarah had been saying that for her birthday snack she wanted Jalissa to go with her. Part of me thought, "Gee, I am the one that gave birth to your five years ago, I should be there." But the other part found it very sweet and endearing. Especially if you understand the relationship between Jarah and Jalissa.

So, I told the school Jalissa was doing community service for the afternoon, Jalissa made arrangements to take a Geography test at an alternate time, and at 12:25 I sent my oldest daughter and my youngest daughter - 11.5 years between them - off to pre-school together. They were loaded with ladybug cupcakes, milk, napkins and cups.

And the next morning I got a call from the pre-school teacher/director telling me things that make any mom's heart soar with pride. In fact, she said she would love for Jalissa to be a peer tutor and come volunteer at pre-school for some of her school hours the next couple years.

Tuesday evening Caleb had a track meet here in town. It was a beautiful day, even if quite windy. I packed up Cael and off we went. It is quite something to watch my 'baby boy' who now stands 6'1" and 185lbs as he warms up, interacts with others and runs....the hurdles! That kind of excites me, since I too ran hurdles in high school. Not long after his second event he came to find me in the stands. When I learned he was done for the evening, I decided to head out and would come back to pick him up since I had other things to do. As we stood up he reached out saying, "Give him to me." He WANTED Cael. I don't know a lot of 15 year-old young men that really want to hold/carry a baby. My oldest son and my youngest son, one held by the other, engaging in mutual love.

It would be so easy for many high schoolers to be all tied up in their own lives and put off by much younger siblings.

I LOVE that my olders children are not that way. I LOVE that they love their siblings. I LOVE that they want to be part of the little ones lives in a very active way.

I have recently sent messages to both Jalissa and Caleb telling them how proud I am of them and that I am so very thankful that God chose me to be their Mom. What an AWESOME privilege. Only by grace and through mercy.

What to write, what to write?

2010-05-04T22:40:00.001-05:00

Analyzing is one of my strong points - or weak points, depending on how you look at it! I THINK about my blog often - more than often - a LOT and have a gazillion ideas of what to write about....but then the analyzer in me kicks in and I talk myself into believing that either my idea is not profound enough or that no one really reads it anyway.

I know those are ridiculous because 1. people tell me they read and 2. it doesn't matter if it's profound as long as it is real.

And then I have a friend on Facebook write this for her status: "Love your self enough to know you are worth more then peoples judgment...." (Thanks Tammy)

So this will just be endless ramblings and if you read it all the way through, maybe there will be a little something that will tug at your heart strings, make you smile, make you cry or move you to act.

Funny place I am in life right now. I have Jalissa scheduling college visits and discussing her future plans with me.....as I sit nursing Cael. I rush from parent night at Jalissa's varsity soccer game, across town to see the end of Jalayna and Jaden Joy's minors softball game. Today Jarah turned 5 and it was her pre-school snack day. She chose for Jalissa to go with her - now that was 'weird' and yet proud to watch my oldest and youngest daughters go off together.

Same with some of the boys. Just the other night Caleb was trying to tell me that Johnson has a girlfriend and has kissed her. I admonished him and said again, "NO kissing til your wedding night." Caleb said, "Awww, he can kiss whenever he wants." To which I told Caleb that if those were the kind of things he was going to teach Johnson then there is NO WAY I will be allowing Johnson to ride the train to spend Summers with Caleb when they are 15 and 27 instead of 3 and 15 like they are now. Caleb laughed at me.

I have always enjoyed watching people.....listening to what's going on around me and watching people for the reactions, actions, expressions, etc. Tonight I had Cael and Caleb's track meet. I think there were at least 3 people that had very large, dramatic reactions when they learned that Cael is baby #9. The sad part is that while the number surprises people, what surprises them even more is when I say, "No twins, yes I delivered them each one at a time and same two parents, still married....and still sane (at least most of the time)." Sad reality of the world we live in today.

Cael seems to be an over achiever - he turned 6mo on a Friday, Sunday popped his first tooth and Wednesday was playing on the floor when he turned himself all the way around and scooted backwards across the floor! OIY, let me tell you as excited as first time parents are to have their baby moving, by the time it is your ninth you are much more patient and willing to wait awhile for those milestones!

We are in birthday 'season' - yes here we have seasons. Four of our children have Spring birthdays, along with Jeff and I's birthdays, our anniversary, mother's day, Easter, and Tulip Time (yes, here Tulip Time counts) - all between April 2 and June 3! The other five are Fall babies between Sept 28 and Dec 12 (add Thanksgiving and stretch to Dec 31 for Christmas and NYE). It is fun to learn each child's love language and has been easy to see this year in their requests for birthdays. One just wanted me to take her shopping and spend the day with her, one consistently asked for a bike since clear back before Christmas (I convinced her Spring birthday is a much better time than Christmas for a bike).

We are also in another season - BASEBALL/SOFTBALL! Cole plays majors baseball, Jalayna and Jaden Joy are on the same minors softball team and Chloe plays rookies softball. Add that to Jalissa playing varsity soccer while Caleb finishes track season and starts high school baseball and well...it's just a little nutty! As if that is not enough I am also holding auditions for our local community theater Summer production that I have the privilege of directing this year.

And while we are on the subject of seasons....I may as well admit that we are in one of "those" seasons of life....I think it is commonly referred to as mid-life......lots of evaluation, self reflection, etc and at times it is just painful. But if we did not know pain then we would have no way to know full joy. And we need the moments of joy to balance the painful moments.

And with that, I end my ramblings for tonight.

Becoming a Speaker

2010-04-08T14:47:00.001-05:00

I will never forget sitting there that day.

Suddenly I had a very strong, vivid vision.

A vision of one day being a speaker - a national speaker.

I was in 8th grade.

The vision has never left me, but I admit over the years (nearly 30 now) it has often been pushed to be back recesses of my mind..........until more recently.

In the last two to three years, God has drawn that vision back to the forefront of my mind. People around me have spoke about the possibility without me having ever even so much as mentioned my vision. It strikes both excitement and fear within me! Could it be, could it really be? A speaking ministry? Me?

What would I speak about? That is the easiest part........and the hardest.

Peaces of a Broken Heart

Pieces of a broken heart ~

However will I mend?

Pieces of a broken heart ~

When will the hurting end?

When I life my eyes toward heaven ~

Only then will I see,

Outstretched arms and loving grace ~

Only God can give to me.

With His love surrounding me ~

Comfort I can find.

Peace that passes understanding ~

There is no greater kind.

Pieces of a broken heart ~

However will I mend?
Peaces of a broken heart~

On God I can depend!

~ Lisa K. Morgan

God is building within and around me a ministry of full reconciliation. I have lived relationships and situations being reconciled that I never in my wildest dreams thought ever would be. See, that is the great beauty of it, it is NOT within my power or doing, it is all because of my great, mighty, powerful and loving God.

All of that reconciliation does not come without pain. And tears. And fears. But even pain, tears and fears can be gifts from the Lord. For through them, He works and restores and reconciles. And then I see and feel Him.

Sometimes the thought of sharing it all (or even some of it) comes with its' own set of fears! But who am I to hold on to what God has done? With that thought and confidence, I want to climb high on a mountaintop and scream the wonders of His work in me! I want every person who can hear to know that the Lord of Lord's wants each of us to have peace - peace that we can only find in a relationship with Him.

March 12 and 13, I attended this year's first Over the Top, Women of Faith conference in Des Moines, Iowa. I listened to the speakers with awe. I listened to their stories. I listened to their hearts. And I realize that yes, one day, I too will share my stories and my heart with the hope that it will bring peace to women and ultimately glory to my God!

And let's face it, with 9 children, there is always a humorous story or two (:

If you could become a Women of Faith speaker, what would you talk about? See what other women are saying and add join the blog hop at:

Puppydogs, Canaries, Kittycats and Goldfish

2010-03-14T21:26:00.000-05:00

We laughed. We cried. We praised. We prayed.

I had the delight of attending a Women of Faith conference Friday and Saturday. It was the first Over the Top for 2010. We heard personal stories and testimonies, great pieces of wisdom, insights to God's Word and purposes, great music and powerful dramas. So many, many tid-bits I took away! One of the funnest that I want to share came from Andy Andrews on Friday.

- Puppydogs -

"Oh what a good good dog you are"

- people who are puppydogs feel most loved when they receive words of encouragement -

- Canaries -

"I just want to sit here beside you and spend time with you"

- people who are canaries are happiest when

they are spending time with someone -

- Kittycats -

"hug me, hold me, kiss me"

- people who are kittycats feel most loved

by touches of love -

- Goldfish -

"wash the dishes, change the oil in the car,

do the laundry, fix meals"

- people who are goldfish feel most loved when

someine DOES something for them -

If we recognize which of these a person is, we can know how to better love them. Obviously the first place to consider this is in our marriages. I was able to quickly recognize that Jeff is a puppydog with a minor in goldfish. I, on the other hand, majored in kittycat with a minor in puppydog. Not surprisingly, we very, very often find ourselves married to our opposite. Often, not long into the marriage, the things that attracted us to our opposite are the very things that are now irritants. So then what? Then, THEN we must realize that love is not based on temporary feeling, love is based on commitment. And in that commitment we then learn to get to know our spouse better and how to speak languages of love that he/she will understand and appreciate.

It is not easy. In fact, sometimes it seems down right impossible. But we have a choice. We always have a choice. When the going is toughest and we choose to love in a language that speaks to our spouse, then the rewards will be much more than we can imagine. Maybe not immediately, but in the long run.

Life and love are a marathon, not a sprint.

So which are you? Puppydog? Canary? Kittycat? Goldfish?

Which is your lover? How can you reach out today and love him/her in a special way?

Sharing Life

2010-02-11T23:12:00.000-06:00

"It takes courage to trust someone with our life, " John Eldridge

In the fast paced, always on the go, keep up our 'Dutch fronts' world that we live in today, it is often all too easy to go about life all on our own. Like a caterpillar wrapped in a cocoon, we stay all cozy and comfy in our predictable routines, doing our own thing and give barely a glance to the people and lives around us. Oh yes, we will acknowledge a crisis or celebrate a big event, but we do not really get down to the nitty-gritty and know one another. We do not share life.

In order to truly share life we must take risks. And that means we must face our fears head on. Our fears of will they like me? Our fears of what will they think? Our fears of will I be accepted? Anyone who says, "I don't care if they like me or not," do not let them kid you, we all care! It takes courage to share life!

On the flip side, am I a person that people find worthy of sharing life with? Am I trustworthy? Do I keep my word? Can I be trusted to keep a secret? Can I be trusted to pray? Most of all, can I be trusted to care for the person's heart?

Today I had the great honor of sharing life - not just once, but FOUR times!

Laura and her sweet 5yo son came to visit this morning.......and they stayed all day! It was GRAND! Laura is the mom of 11 - some home-grown and some hand-picked - all loved and cared for! Jarah and Johnson enjoyed playing with their new friend. And honestly, Johnson enjoyed it even more when Jarah went to pre-school this afternoon! =) Watching the boys be....well, boys, Laura and I laughed and laughed. We laughed at so many things today - so many similarities. And we cried - sometimes outwardly and sometimes inwardly. I admire her strength, her tenderness, her smile, her joy in the midst of turmoil. Most of all, I enjoyed sharing life (oh and she did not seem to care how clean *or not* my house was).

Right after school, Jeff and I took five of our children and headed to Des Moines to watch Caleb's basketball game. During the few months Caleb has now been in high school he has become great friends with another young man. Jeff and I have slowly gotten to know his parents and tonight, I had the honor of having Lyn come sit with me at the game and we talked. Not just the usual, "Hey how are you, how was your day," type of talk....but really life stuff. Things like how do we handle these freshman boys liking girls in a whole new way. =) I learned a good deal about Lyn tonight, and I so appreciate that she allowed me to openly ask questions in order to do so. I very much learned that her beauty comes as much from the inside as it does the outside.

We got home late this evening and bless my dear husband, he offered to clean pre-school for me so that I could get children to bed. After the ones that needed to were ready and heading up, I sat down to feed Cael and check my emails. I am a fast reader and can skim quickly to determine what is important and needs my attention first.

First was a note from my friend Jen. Jen is one of the most giving, loving women I have ever meet. She is always there with a kind or encouraging word, a helping hand and a huge, caring heart. She has 5 beautiful children, including triplets that just turned 9. Long story short, Nick (one of the triplets) has a golf ball size lump on the top of his brain and the world renowned neurosurgeon they saw today said, "He does not have cancer, it is worse!" Cancer is often a parents worst nightmare, imagine being told it is worse than cancer! By the end of February Nick will undergo a potentially dangerous brain surgery. The doctor, and Jen, are confident he will have a full recovery, but the reality is that no one knows that for certain and there are some very big risks. I was able to touch base with Jen on Facebook for a few minutes and she knows I am putting my cell phone beside my bed and she can call me ANYTIME! Jen and I have shared life enough that she knows she can come to me and that...... that, is sharing life in the tough, tumultuous times.

I got another email from a friend who is newly pregnant with her sixth child. Long story short, the placenta has begun to tear away from the wall and there is a very real threat of miscarriage. She has been wanting another baby for quite some time. One time when we talked I actually told her to ask God for the desires of her heart and if it is His will then it will be granted. And just when she least expected, she discovered she was indeed pregnant! Any woman who has been pregnant knows that as soon as that test turns up positive you instantly have 20+ years of hopes and dreams flash through your mind. It is crushing to consider that none of them may even have a change to become reality. So I am praying with her for God's protection. That is sharing life.

As I sit here reflecting on my day I realize God gave me a very big gift today. Not only did I have the privilege and honor of sharing life with four beautiful women today, but God gave me some insight. God allowed me to see and experience that indeed, I am a person worthy of sharing life with.

And now, I have been asked to take a risk myself and share my life, share my heart, share my vision......and I realize that I am going to have to find some courage to do so. But you will have to come back and read more later to see how I did.

Haiti's Infant Orphans

2010-02-05T11:43:00.000-06:00

The earthquake in Haiti struck home with me harder than any natural disaster I remember. We do not have money to donate and so I kept thinking, "There has to be another way I can help!" One day shortly after the earthquake I have a vision - one that was/is so incredibly vivid that it is amazing - of sitting nursing the infant orphans/babies in Haiti.....not just for feeding them, but the skin to skin contact that is so important for development, and in between feedings helping to care for the babies....and possibly helping moms begin and establish their own breastfeeding relationships.

I posted on a private message board I am part of, asking if it is a weird idea. No one said it is (or at least no one admitted it if they thought so ). It's not really a new idea - it has actually been done for centuries, but in our modern society is much less common so seems 'weird' to many.

Then Beth posted some links.....statements from the WHO and UNICEF, etc that specifically say they want all babies in Haiti breastfed. They do not have safe water for making formula. And no proper storage for donated breastmilk. Not to mention keeping bottles sterilized and safe is nearly impossible right now.

Then Krystle posted this last night:
http://www.ilca.org/files/in_the_news/E ... ursing.pdf

A press release that specifically talks about the option of wet nursing.

So I emailed the listed contact - the Executive Director of the International Lactation Consultant Association (anyone want to guess WHY the ED is a MAN???? that is just wrong ) )

Anyway here is what I emailed him and his response:
Me, "Hello,
Since the Haiti earthquake I have felt a strong desire to help with breastfeeding the infant orphans. I was just referred to your article: http://www.ilca.org/files/in_the_news/E ... ursing.pdf

How would I go about spending time in Haiti being a wet nurse for those precious babies?

THANK YOU
~lisa

And his response: "Lisa,
What a generous offer! Right now we do not have an organization who are calling for us to give them names, but we will put you on a list of people who are willing to consider helping. We will be in touch with you if we get requests.
Thanks,
Jim
_______
Ok then this morning through a series of contacts I was told to email this lady so my email to her was essential the same was the one above, her response was, "Good morning Lisa,
As far as I know Mission of Hope has not received any requests in this area. You may be able to contact the person who wrote the article and they should be able to give you more information on where in Haiti this need may be.
God bless you!
Cathy Holland, Mission of Hope"
_______________
grrrr, I did that already and got nowhere!

I am thinking that I need to connect with a medical mission possibly.....one that is especially caring for infants though.....you would think with the world wide web these days, that even something 'different' like I am wanting could be relatively easy to find.

Jeff says I will go by March and that I will end up leading a mission of Moms around the world to do this over time and continue to help these babies.

If anyone reading has any ideas (even if they do not seem related) I would love to know about them so I can check them out.

I will keep you posted!

Wordless Wednesday

2010-02-03T12:32:00.000-06:00

Love is NOT Selfish

2010-02-03T00:38:00.000-06:00

is the theme for Day 3 of the Love Dare.

I admit, life kind of got in the way and I got distracted from my Love Dare mission (2 car accidents and a nephew being life flighted give me a good excuse, right?) so I am behind.

I was determined to get back on track and, well, there is no time like the present.

Quite awhile ago Jeff deemed our family motto to be "Fight hard and love harder" - tonight was one of the "fight hard" parts. I hate it, absolutely hate it and I cry and it drains me. But it is what it is.

Then I felt prompted to pick up "Love Dare" again. And what do I find but "love is not selfish." SELFISH? ME? I am NOT selfish! At the exact moment I want to soak myself up in a pity party and I am being called to not be selfish? And the exact moment when I most want to be selfish (after all isn't that what most fighting is, "I am right, you are wrong and I am NOT giving in"?). It's the root of human nature, selfishness is. Doesn't that just figure that when I most want to sulk in ultimate selfishness that I am called out and challenged to NOT be selfish?!?!

11pm I head to Wal-Mart (I am not a night owl, I NEVER do things like this). I get a bag of mini-Reeses and a bag of Hershey's Kisses. I grab a role of scotch tape (somehow the children always find it around here no matter where I stash it, when I need some it is gone). And, I found an absolutely PERFECT card! I checked out and headed to the car (well, the loaner car since mine is being repaired from aforementioned car accident #2). I had grabbed 2 pieces of card stock before I left home and on the first I wrote "FIGHT HARD", on the second, "LOVE HARDER". Then I taped Reeses to the first and Kisses to the second.....my original thought was the write the words out with the candy but I would have needed a VERY large piece of paper for that! When I was done I laughed because it really looked ridiculous. So at the bottom I wrote, "This seemed like a good idea but now it looks funny and I sat here laughing. I hope it makes you laugh too," with a smiley face. I laid them both in the front passenger seat along with the signed card.

Jeff will find it all in the morning. I truly hope it makes him smile. I know I feel a little lighter having done it tonight.

Love is Kind

2010-01-24T22:41:00.000-06:00

That is the theme for Day 2 of "Love Dare"

The alarm was set for 5am Saturday morning because I intended to hit the gym before going to Jalissa's forensics competition. My intentions were good, but.....

4:15am Cael woke uncharacteristically early to nurse
around 4:45am, I put him back to bed with a full tummy and decided I need sleep more than the gym and re-set the alarm
6:25am, I woke in a panic because Jalissa was to be at the high school at 6:45! I called up the stairs for her to get up and I jumped in the shower for a quick wash.....I had barely gotten started when Jalissa burst in the bathroom screaming hysterically, "You are in the shower?!?!?" I said, "Yes, I will be quick." She yelled back, "But I am late." I said, "You will be fine, you are supposed to be there at 6:45, and will just be couple minutes late with plenty of time to get your make-up on, the bus isn't leaving until 7:30." It was at the point she decided to inform be their arrival time had changed to 6:30 (UGH). And she said, "Can I just take the car and go?" I said, "No, I need the car." Needless to say, she was not happy. Somewhere in there, Jeff had gotten up and knocked something off the counter and was sweeping it up.

As I went to throw on clothes, Jalissa went to start the car and all of a sudden I hear, "OH CRAP" - Jeff was not pleased because the dog had pooped on the floor some time during the night and Jalissa unknowingly stepped in it on her way out.

We made it - and, for the record, she arrived by 6:55am.

I was only 2 minutes from the school when I heard "It's a hard knock life...." coming from my cell phone. Jalissa coyly says, "I forgot my shorts and tank top." And we discuss if she really needed them and how soon (yes and immediately, of course). So I got home, talked with Jeff about whether he was going along or not (because if he was I did not need to get Cael up right then and head back to follow the bus at 7:30). He decided he was but we were going to take Johnson too. So I ran upstairs to get Jalissa's shorts and tank top and got Johnson up also.

I dumped Johnson on our bed for Jeff to get ready and I left to take Jalissa's things to her. 15minutes later I returned home, moved the carseats from van to the car and we were quickly trying to get ready. Since we were not following the bus we did not need to leave as early. But it was also very foggy, so we did not want to push it too long. Jeff was ready, Johnson was ready, Cael was still sleeping and I was finishing up when I hear, "*&^% dog" he pooped on the floor again and this time Jeff stepped in it (we had turned on minimal lights). I don't know what was up with the dog, but we have since chuckled it all fit with the theme of a 'poopy morning' - lol

8am - out the door and on our way!

We weren't too far down the road when I asked, "Do you know where the high school is?" Jeff thought for a moment and said, "Yes!" We enjoyed nice, friendly, casual conversation on the way.

It was about 8:45 when I got a real sense that something was amiss. Turned out that Jeff had gone East on the Interstate when he should have gone West and we were a good half hour out of our way. I am not sure how I managed to do it without duct tape, but I kept my negative thoughts to myself and found some humor in it. My biggest concern was Jalissa being worried if we weren't there and not being able to focus on her performance. Jeff pretty much 'flew' back to where we needed to be, trying to get there in time, then had difficulty finding the high school and well, it was 9:15 when he dropped me out front (performance time was 9:10). By the time I got in, figured out what room they were in and found it, the doors were closed with a note "Do not open, Performance underway, will open during breaks." I knew from experience that if we tried to enter at that point, the team could be disqualified, so I was not taking the chance.

I turned around heading back down the hall and saw Jeff coming with the little boys. I told him we missed it and had to explain that it simply was NOT possible to go in now. We piddled around in the halls a bit and finally I told Jeff that we needed to go to the cafeteria so we could get settled a bit, get Cael changed (I had taken him straight from his bed to the carseat) and I could nurse Cael.

I had took Johnson potty with me while Jeff started to change Cael. We got back and I finished get Cael dressed. I had just sat down to nurse Cael when a lady with a clipboard walked in saying loudly, "Excuse me, EXCUSE ME! Is there Lisa or Jeff Morgan here?" Jeff was right behind her with Johnson in tow. The was a police officer right beside her, that she indicated wanted to speak to us. My first thought was, "What happened with the kids at home?" (Caleb, 15 was in charge). Jeff's first thought was, "HOW did they catch me going 90 on the interstate?"

Turns out a school bus hit our car in the parking lot. When I heard that I walked across to Jeff, we locked eyes and laughed. I said, "wow, that just fits with the day this day is going." The bus hit between the front and back doors on the driver's side. The damage appears to be minimal (especially when you consider what a school bus could do to a Kia Spectra). Call it irony or call it a God sighting (we call it the later) but our insurance agent was there because his daughter was performing also.

Jalissa was not thrilled we missed it, she was even less happy the car got hit (she thinks it is her's - NOT), but she also understood how the morning had gone and was ok. Besides the will perform again this Friday right here in Pella.

I kept thinking all day about how/what to do as an unexpected act of kindness. It was the unexpected part that kept tripping me up. I finally decided that the day was a success just making it through all the challenges and still being able to laugh together.

So, Sunday has been Day 2 - Kindness - again - because some days, you just need a do-over!

Love is Patient

2010-01-23T17:25:00.000-06:00

That is the theme for Day 1 of 'Love Dare'. The book was first introduced in the movie, "Fireproof" and over time more people have discovered it. It is filled with 40 days of scripture, inspiration and actions/activitites to help you to a better marriage. Even the 'best' marriages can use a boost from time to time, right?

I first picked up 'Love Dare' and started it the beginning of 2009. I am sad to report that I made it about 4 days before I fizzled out.

Last week, my friend Sherry posed a challenge for a group of us to agree to do 'Love Dare' together. I think a dozen people finally agreed. Friday, January 22, 2010 was Day 1. Some people are blogging about their day as the day unfolds. For me, I had to wait until the day was completed and process it a bit before I could blog.

I wholeheartedly agreed with those who suggested this 'Love Dare' is not only good for marriages, but for entire families. Because as parents, I believe, one of the greatest gifts we can give our children is a positive marriage, that not always show just a happy face, but show how to get through the hard times of life and keep going together also. So any time we have an opportunity to 'tune-up' our marriages there is a resulting domino effect in our families.

Love is Patient was the theme for Day 1. The challenge was to not saying anything negative or rude to our spouses. Not one thing, NOTHING! Get out the duct tape if necessary, but hold your tongue even in frustration and see if you don't feel better, lighter, more positive at the end of the day. Not to mention how your spouse is likely to respond in kind.

I admit I chuckled when Laura (I think it was her) said something about doing so well....until....she walked in on a 2yo spitting milk everywhere! I can laugh only because it was not happening at my house! LOL Sometimes, it is the children that I lose my patience with and it sort of 'spews' over from there.

So day 1 is patience. As if that is not challenge enough, I decided to take my 4yo, 3yo and 3mo to watch the homecoming activities at the high school (this includes my 16yod and 15yob). This meant NO NAPS! I knew I was taking a risk, but I also knew I could just pack them up and come home at any time.

The biggest challenge was..........................getting out the door! Jarah did not want to look for her tennis shoes (we have a propensity for misplacing kid shoes around here), Johnson is a very active, very curious 3 year-old BOY, and sweet baby Cael HATES the carseat! I resorted to letting Jarah wear her boots (hey they are in fashion), got the big van warming up, carried boys one by one across the ice to buckle in the van, and ignored Cael protests to the carseat. Once we were on our way, we were FINE! And I had no problems with patience as I corralled them over and over from climbing up and down the bleachers in the gym. I was a bit embarrassed at the end when we discovered the carseat was STUCK - HARD in the bleachers. But two wonderful men came to my rescue and with their help, we loosened and got it out.

But now, none of that applies to my marriage and the real challenge, does it? Hmm, well, I think I was successful. There was one frustrating thing that came up, but I did not say anything negative.

'Love Dare' - Day 1 - Patience......no duct tape required! =)

FiNgeR fUn!

2010-01-22T11:04:00.000-06:00

Some of my girls found a book with fingernail designs, so we decided to do some!

A trip to Wal-Mart resulted in 10 bottles of polish, add in a few we already had, and this is what we started with

Me painting Chloe's basecoat of white, Jarah in the background watching over Jalissa as she paints yellow polka dots on red background

Finishing up Chloe's second coat of white

Jalissa finished nails

I had to add this one just to show that my teenager can never be far from her cell phone (yes, mom rolls her eyes) - The pretty green nails belong to Jalayna

Jalayna and Jalissa with their polka dots on the left, Jaden Joy and Jalayna on the right.

Chloe had the most complicated design of the night, you can hardly see it here but there is strip of red also. It was late and she was tired as I snapped this picture.

We had fun and will definitely do it again. Just have to pick a better time of day so we have more time and can do more fun designs!

Saturday morning....

2010-01-21T11:20:00.000-06:00

Some Saturdays are a flurry of activity with people going here or there for this or that. Sometimes it actually 'quieter' and then this is what it looks like....

Cole was least impressed because he still had 8 am basketball practice and he like to have lazy mornings.

Jalissa had agreed to trade work schedules with someone and thought she had to work at Straver's True Value from 8 - noon, but when she got there it was mixed up. So she came home and crashed on the loveseat until she did have to work at 10am. Jarah and Jalayna were snuggled in watching something on the idiot tube.

Chloe was being a bum too, but really enjoyed a chance to play with Cael.

Johnson kept running in our bedroom and snuggling up....

WHY? ........

Because Daddy was still sleeping and Johnson wanted him!

I Miss You

2010-01-20T08:50:00.000-06:00

Dear Blog,

I miss you. I am so sorry you feel neglected. It is not because I do not want to give you time and attention. I actually have a lot I would like to share. I just can't seem to get to it - or I get to it and get interrupted. My goal is to give you a little time every day - I will try to do better.

All we need is Love - or is it?

2010-01-13T11:11:00.000-06:00

A few weeks ago during a Sunday sermon the question was posed, "Are you loved? Do you FEEL loved?"

Those are two decidedly different questions!

I have been pondering it over and over - and over and over.

Am I loved? YES! I am a child of God and have the beauty of knowing the love of Christ. My husband loves me to the point he would lay down his life for me. My children love me - some of them still unconditionally, some wonder at moments :) So in my head I 'know' I am loved.

So then does it matter if I 'FEEL' loved? If I can say in my head that I am loved, does it matter if I feel it or not? When I am not feeling very loved, should I be able to 'rationalize' in my brain, "I AM loved," and that be enough?

If I am being loved in 'languages' that are not mine, should that be enough? If I do not get love in the way that most feels and speaks love to me, should I be able to go beyond that and recoginze demonstrations of love in other ways and have that be enough?

I have tried and tried to convince myself that it should be enough - that feeling it does not really matter. But the reality is, it DOES matter! It makes a difference in how I feel about myself, it makes a difference in my self-confidence, it makes a difference in how I function. That is not to say that all my self worth lies in the expression of love from others. It is an admission, that I am a simple and frail human who needs to not only be able to recognize in her brain that she is loved, but also feel it.

And I believe it is what Christ has called us to ultimately. The second great commandment is to love others. In order to truly do that we need to be entering into relationships so deep that we know the person well enough to know how they feel loved and we then act on it.

What can you and I do today to make someone FEEL love in a new and special way? It does not have to be big or extravagant, it can be the simplest gesture - a hug, a kiss, a kind note, doing an unfavorable chore for another....the possibilities are limited only by our willingness to act.

We all want love - we even need love - it is a requirement of our human condition.

Color Photo Challenge - White

2010-01-05T10:21:00.000-06:00

Photo Color Challenge - Green

2010-01-03T22:19:00.001-06:00

Amongst our munchkins with big blue eyes, we have one that stands out - my 'green eyed monster'

Seriously?

2010-01-03T22:04:00.000-06:00

Sometimes I just plain take life to seriously.

And let's face it, with a large family there is a lot of organizational, scheduling, managerial type stuff that I need to do to simply keep us all functioning and moving ahead. Sometimes it I catch myself focusing too much on the 'tasks' and not enjoying the 'people'. Sometimes I do not catch myself until it is too late and I have missed out on what could have been a special moment.

Or consider this. We go along, living life all normally. Then I find out my twin sister and her husband are on their way to Iowa City with their 18 year old son because he has a blockage due to his Cystic Fibrosis. Timothy does so incredibly well and other than a few stays in the hospital for high pseudonym levels, he does very well and you would not know anything is wrong with him. He is rushed into emergency surgery where the surgeon then discovers the situation is much worse than anyone suspected. At some point his intestines has already burst and intestinal fluid was leaking. Gangrene was starting to set in. The was a 'black spot' on his intestines so they removed part of his intestines and also removed his appendix. As of this writing he is still in pediatric ICU and pretty doped up on Morphine.

And suddenly you realize once again how precious and precarious life is. Not only for Timothy, but for any and all of us.

And you realize, it is really not worth taking life so seriously all the time. Yes, planning and organization need to happen, but so do relationships. And it is relationships and special, unexpected moments that stay with us forever. What if we focused more on recognizing and even making special moments happen? Then we would really be investing in this one this that Christ teaches us is the most important - relationships with each other.

When asked which is the greatest commandment in the land, Jesus replies, "'Love the Lord your God with all you heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.' This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ' Love your neighbor as yourself.'" (Matthew 22: 37-39, NIV). If we are focusing on others and building relationships with them, then we are a whole lot less focused on ourselves and a lot less likely to take life too seriously.

I don't know about you, but I do not want to miss out on the precious moments that may present themselves. And when I get to the end of my life here on earth I do not want to look back and regret that while I got everything done, I missed out on the more important - no the most important.......people!

Color Photo Challenge - Blue

2010-01-01T17:51:00.002-06:00

First Time Obedience

2009-12-30T23:10:00.000-06:00

This is a more practical post that what I have written to date.

When we were in our young years of parenting we used the old "1, 2, 3" method of disciplining. You know how it works: parent gives child an instruction, child ignores or is defiant, parent says, "1" and waits, child again ignores or is defiant, parent says, "2" and waits, child again ignores or becomes more defiant, parent says, "3" and starts to move, child then panics and does what was instructed in the first place, or chooses to suffers whatever consequences parent dishes out.

Then we introduced to First Time Obedience. The reasoning behind it made so much sense that we forged ahead using this technique and never looked back. In fact, when I hear people using, "1, 2, 3" - or "1, 2, 3 Magic" as it has now been termed - I cringe.

The basis is this: when parent gives instruction to a child, child is expected to obey with a good attitude the FIRST time. For us it looks like this:

*Parent ensures they have direct eye contact with child before speaking
*Parent gives child instruction
*Child is expected to respond with, "Yes, Mom (Dad or whoever)," WITH a good attitude. Snippy, snotty, angry responses are not acceptable and if given parent responds with, "With a good attitude," and child is expected to repeat, "Yes, Mom (Dad or whoever)," again WITH a good attitude (sometimes this needs repeated more than once, sometimes not at all).
*Child completes instruction with good attitude - if they do not then parent enforces or employs chosen, appropriate consequences, and for us, we then go back and start over and yes, they still have to complete the original instruction

What's the difference? The difference is, with "1, 2, 3" children learn that the 'line' is really at 3 and until parent gets to 3, they do not really have to do anything. "1, 2, 3" really allows parents to be 'lazy' in my opinion because sometimes you will get children who obey before 3 and thus you do not have to move or do anything. First time obedience requires parents to be consistent and act, get up off your booty, IMMEDIATELY.

If you use "1, 2, 3" in parenting what are you teaching your child(ren) for when they go to school or even later when they enter the work force? In contrast, teaching First Time Obedience, will result in older children, teenagers, and adults to who what they are told, when they are told, without whining and complaining and being flat out defiant. IMAGINE how wonderful it would be in any work situation to have people who do that! IMAGINE how wonderful it is to have older children and teens who are much more pleasant to live with because they have been taught and trained from a young age to obey the first time, with a good attitude!

If you have questions, I am very open to answering what I can from my experience just let me know!

Color Photo Challenge - Red

2009-12-30T16:12:00.000-06:00

For this I offer 3 photos:

Color Photo Challenge - Purple

2009-12-30T14:54:00.000-06:00

Christmas Banquet 2009

2009-12-23T19:19:00.001-06:00

This year we had two high schoolers attend Pella Christian High School's annual Christmas Banquet.

Jalissa is a Sophomore. Her beautiful dress was wonderful deal we found on tax-free weekend, on the clearance rack at Maurice's marked down to a whopping $8.72. In order to meet the dress code we paid just over $12 for a simple alteration. Voila, a beautiful girl in a beautiful dress:

Caleb is a Freshman and actually enjoys dressing up. His biggest joy of this outfit was his tie. Not only was it a neat Winter theme, but being the outrageous Christmas fan he is, the tie also played music (three different Christmas songs)!

And much to their chagrin, Mom had to have one picture of them together:

(Can you tell Caleb just wants to get out of the house and on to the Banquet? hehehe)

Perspective.....

2009-12-23T18:55:00.000-06:00

I keep thinking, "I need to post on my blog!" And twenty million different ideas go through my mind and because I can not settle on just one, then I just avoid writing anything. This afternoon, I decided I would sit down and write something....anything....as long as I actually do it and post it. Then I let Jalissa use my lap top, inventoried Christmas gifts already purchased and determined what we still need to get, kept laundry going, and sat down at the home desktop computer.

Turned it on, made Jalissa come look how neat my blog pages looks on this screen (because my lap top cuts off the sides), checked Facebook, and then got busy cleaning off the computer table.

Then I checked Facebook again and my beautiful, first born daughter wrote this as the last line of a note:
"When I put my trust in wordly things, things other than my Jesus, I wound up hurt, but he picks me back up and sets me on my feet."

Instantly I knew what I would write about!

It is so easy at Christmas time to get wrapped up in the worldly aspects. The world tells us to live large. From commercials to music to toy aisles, we are told we must give our children everything. The bigger the better. The more money we spend the more they will love us. Yes, even as a Christian it can be easy to buy into the belief that our children 'need' the latest, greatest, biggest, most expensive.....

I took inventory of what gifts we have already purchased for this year and made a list of who still needs what. Would you believe that everything for 9 kids fit in a single layer on our queen size bed? By worldly standards this would cause shock and disappointment. I will admit that for awhile I was sad.

We live very simply and do not look to have a lot of material 'extras'. Yet in this moment, I flashed back to my childhood and remembered seemingly endless piles of presents and I wanted that for my children as well.

Then Jesus picked me up and set me back on my feet and I got my focus back. There is pleasure in seeking the right presents for my children within a very limited budget.

As I sit here finishing this post over 24 hours later, I am surrounded by sounds that make my heart leap with joy: the oldest two boys sharing stories over the kitchen sink as they peel potatoes together; the oldest and youngest daughters drawing Christmas cards for the dog on the front room floor together, two of the girls working together to dis-assemble the exersaucer and clean it up for the baby to begin to use, my dear husband frying chicken for dinner....and now, the 3yo boys screaming in frustration because he is being bugged by older brother, lol.

All of that makes me realize that all year long, day in and day out, we give our children the greatest gifts we can: love, security, hope, and teach them to have faith in God. And the funny part is, they do not ask for the 'big ticket' items. They are happy with simple things in life.

If only it was as easy for us (me) to be always contente with the simple things in life as well.

Perspective, it is all about perspective.

Christmas Edition of Getting to Know Your Friends

2009-12-16T06:33:00.000-06:00

Welcome to the Christmas edition of getting to know your blogger friends. Okay, here's what you're supposed to do, just copy and paste it to your blog...erase the answers and then answer them yourself! I have never done something like this before....but it was fun!

1. Wrapping paper or gift bags?
I wrap! But I am not very good at it!

2. Real tree or Artificial?
Tree? Are we supposed to have a tree? Yes, it is 9 days until Christmas and still not tree. :(

3. When do you put up the tree?
Refer to #2

4. When do you take the tree down?
This implies we actually have a tree.

5. Do you like eggnog?
ewwwww, yucky

6. Favorite gift received as a child?
I don't remember

7. Hardest person to buy for?
My dad!

8. Easiest person to buy for?
My kids!

9. Do you have a nativity scene?
Yes

10. Mail or email Christmas cards?
www.sendoutcards.com/72386

11. Worst Christmas gift you ever received?
ummmm?

12. Favorite Christmas Movie?
I love all the classics...It's a Wonderful Life...Rudolph....Frosty....all of them!

13. When do you start shopping for Christmas?
depends from year to year

14. Have you ever recycled a Christmas present?
No

15. Favorite thing to eat at Christmas?
Chex mix

16. Lights on the tree?
YES!

17. Favorite Christmas song?
I like almost all of them

18. Travel at Christmas or stay home?
All our family lives close - so stay home or near home

19. Can you name all of Santa's reindeer?
Yes.....if I sing it :)

20. Angel on the tree top or a star?
Looking for a new topper this year - if we ever get a tree

21. Open the presents Christmas Eve or morning?
Christmas morning, although sometimes late on Christmas Eve Jeff and I will share one.

22. Most annoying thing about this time of the year?
Not much

23. Favorite ornament, theme, or color?
I have precious ornaments G'Ma Wiggins made every year...and the first 6 kids all have stockings she made.

24. Favorite for Christmas Dinner?
I want the traditional Turkey Dinner!

25. What do you want to do for Christmas this year?
Enjoy my family

26. Favorite Christmas tradition growing up?
I liked the excitement and hustle and bustle of Christmas Eve at G'Pa and G'Ma Wiggins', the Christmas morning at home and rushing off to G'Pa and G'Ma Johnson's for lunch!

27. Favorite tradition now?
All the activities with the kiddos!

28. Favorite Christmas Memory?
ohhh idk, so many......

Run? Why?

2009-12-11T22:16:00.000-06:00

After a 10mo 'break' due to high risk pregnancy and having a baby, I returned to the gym this morning. My gym membership actually re-activated on Dec 1, but baby Cael was not cooperating with Mommy's desire to go to the gym in the early morning hours. So, finally today, I made it. A few minutes after 5am I was there and ready to get after it. I did 1 mile on the elliptical machine, 2 sets of 25 sit-ups, 2 miles on the stationary bike and another 2 sets of 25 sit-ups.

As much as I was excited to get back into an exercise routine, I was also anxious. I know I can not start where I left of, but I had no idea how things would go and I would feel this morning. I am thrilled to find I could still do a good tempo, could still do a good number of sit-ups and, the best part, it felt GREAT!

This gives me about 3 months to get into shape in the gym and then hopefully the weather will begin to shape up enough that I can get back out on the streets. On the streets? What for? To RUN! The Summer, 2008 I ran over 300 miles on the streets of Pella. I also completed 8 races - 6 5K's, 1 4K and 1 10K. That was the Summer of my 40th year and having had 8 babies then. I was pretty proud of my achievement.

I have a couple loftier goals for Summer 2010 :)

The mere fact that I run will have people asking me, "Why," with quizzical looks on their faces. Add to it, that I run in the really early morning hours and people begin to call my sanity into question.

Just the opposite is true. Running helps save my sanity. And, the Summer, 2008, I am sure it helped save my life.

Running in the early morning hours does many things:

1. I have always been a morning person so it is my best time of day.
2. It is a great way to start my day and get my blood pumping before I have to rise and shine all the kiddos.
3. It keeps me in great physical shape and I love that and I want to be around and healthy for a very long time for my children.
4. I love the way I feel and look so it helps my mental health also.
5. It is great time to spend with Christ - sometimes in conversation, sometimes in worship as I listen to songs, sometimes quietly as I enjoy the splendor of His creation along my route.
6. It sets a good example for my children.

Here is just one example. It was late Summer, so the early morning hours were still pretty dark. It had also rained during the night, leaving puddles on the streets. I ran about 6 miles and was in the last two blocks when I looked down, and as I was about to put my foot down I saw a frog. Yes, a frog. Why is that significant? Because at the same moment I heard a still, small voice clearly say, "Lisa are you FROG'ing'?"

F.R.O.G. - Fully Rely On God

It is a daily choice and in this world we live in today, a daily challenge...sometimes a moment by moment challenge!

So, I run. I run for me, for my marriage and for my children.

And I can not wait to get started running again!

Toast

2009-12-04T21:58:00.000-06:00

Yes - toast!

A recent status on FB read something to the effect of, "I *heart* toast." And somehow I got to thinking about toast.

We are all like a piece of toast. How so, you ask?

Toast begins as a lump of dough that has to be kneaded over and over. Just as God has kneaded each of us into being.

The dough then needs to bake - we often refer to pregnant moms as having a 'bun in the oven'

The bread is sliced into several pieces - our lives are made up of many slices of time/eras

Take a slice of bread and toast it - just as we go through the fires of life to be refined according to the desires of Christ

In another sense, once toasted the bread is no longer soft. Many of us, as we walk the fires of life, get harder and 'crusty'.

And when the 'bread' is now toast, it leaves behind crumbs, pieces of itself that are thrown away. How many of us get crusty or 'toasted' and leave behind 'crumbs' - either pieces of ourselves or crumbs of damage we have caused?

My prayer is that I never get so 'toasted' that I am not soft enough to be molded into what Christ wants me to be.

Where are you - bread or toast?

Monday Mumblings

2009-11-30T23:08:00.000-06:00

Originally titled "Monday MORNING Mumblings" - LoL Just the change in title gives you a preview of life works around here. Constantly changing!

Here is the scope of things today:

Jalayna (10yo) flat out lied (not the first time) so we had a discussion about it again - and I can not say I was the most patient about the whole deal since lying is probably the one thing I least tolerate

Caleb (almost 15), "Mom, can you tie my tie for me?"

Johnson (almost 3yo) dancing and singing to "Big Green Tractor" on Caleb's ipod touch (that honestly, he can operate better than I can)

Baby Cael (almost 6weeks) needing to snuggle more with Mom this morning than usual

Jarah (4yo) consuming more than half a box of Kraft Mac n' Cheese herself for lunch and then pretending to be asleep at nap time but giggling when I catch her peeking

Cole (12yo) showing his generosity and growing maturity as he willingly helped out with some things and then offered to use his birthday cash for entry into a game so we did not have to stop and get some

Jalayna, Jaden Joy (9yo) and Chloe (7yo) caught not doing simple chores there were told to do and then determining whether to send them to bed immediately or make them complete the chores (I chose the later - which then put them to bed much later than usual and I may regret come morning)

Jalissa (16yo) getting off the bus after school and announcing she needed to go to work (for someone else) and while getting ready telling all about being 'dissed' by what she thought was her group of best girl friends

Caleb starting his first high school basketball game and helping the team to their first victory

Jalissa begging over and over to hold Baby Cael so she could show him off at the game

Caleb ending up wrapped up in teenage drama after the game that involved his girlfriend, misunderstandings, and his sister's nose where it should not be, leaving him with quite an adrenaline rush that made him want to do one of two things: crash/sleep or 'beat someone' - I told him the first was a much better option

Jalissa having her nose in her brother's business where it did not belong, being mean to both Caleb and me (while I was across town at home and could not do anything about the situation anyway) and her later text "Sorry," "For what?" "Being a butthead" - which I hope was sincere and she will be in a better mood tomorrow

Caleb offering to help me clean pre-school and get a few groceries just so he could talk out the situation with me and while I was talking to him throughout, I was also texting with his girlfriend - trying to help them both understand the opposite sex

And those are only highlights of things with my children today. They do not account for and afternoon dentist visit, taking my mother-in-law and helping her with her cell plan (while also adding a line/phone to our's for Caleb's upcoming birthday), making an unexpected Orthodonic appointment and a Chiropratic appointment that will now take up most of the morning tomorrow and many other every day things like laundry and dishes!

And sometimes I wonder why I am tired at the end of the day!

Hope

2009-11-29T23:21:00.000-06:00

As a Christian, today I entered the Advent Season. Advent is the period beginning four Sundays before Christmas when we anxiously anticipate celebrating the birth of Jesus Christ. Each Sunday we light a candle that represents something for this season. The first candle lit today is for HOPE - hope for the impending return of our Lord. The question posed this morning at my church was, "What do you find hope in?" Not an easy question to answer - or at least not for me - or at least not if you give it more than fleeting consideration. As I sit here late in the evening with my precious newborn, Cael, asleep on my chest, I can not help but think about the baby Jesus. Think of Him in awe. To think he started as a baby and came to be my Savior. Sinless and shameless, yet he walked as a human man. Able to feel all the feelings of man, experience many trials, suffer the greatest persecution. And yet, he remained sinless and shameless. The opposite is also true. Being sinless and shameless, He did exactly the opposite of what most men (and women) would do. He did not condemn or snub all the sinners around Him, instead he loved them. Correcting them, yes, but in love. In that there is great hope! Because He gave us an exact model and showed us what can be. Not only that, He is coming back again and some believers will see Him face to face right here on Earth!

Beyond the petty day to day things of life

2009-11-13T14:42:00.000-06:00

Socks on the floor.....Toilet seat up.....cap off the toothpaste.....dishes left by the tv.....beyond the petty day to day things of life that can irritate us faster than fast, there is a much deeper facet to our lives. A deeper facet in which I am loved by my husband in a way no one else can love me. The story I am about to share, is mine and yet it is more Jeff's because he lived it and told it to me. So I will re-tell it hear the best that I can, but in all honesty it is still hard for me to grasp in some ways. Jeff shared this all with me after the fact, and you will understand why when you read it. For a couple weeks before I gave birth to Cael, Jeff had a VERY strong feeling/sense that he was going to lose me that day. He felt like he was in a spiritual battle for my life and he really felt like he was not going to win. So strong was this feeling/sense that one day he dashed out of school/work, drove across town to our church and barged into our pastor's office. I am not sure if it was before or after being in the office, but at some point, Jeff laid face down in the parking lot of church sobbing. He said to the pastor, "I feel like I just fell in love with her and now I am going to lose her." Knowing my husband as I do, I just see and feel the passion with which this was said. The morning of Oct 23, the weather here was 'dark'. I took very little notice of it other than to think, "good day to not be outside." Jeff on the other hand, felt the battle raging. We had only been at the hospital a few minutes when we were told that late the afternoon before the hospital put a new policy in place, "No one under 18 can visit anywhere in the hospital - including siblings in OB." Jeff decided he needed to drive home to deliver the news to Jalissa. She was in the shower so they talked 'through' the curtain and I am told she took it well (better than I anticipated). Jeff gave her permission to go ahead and not go to school, but asked her to pray. As Jeff drove back (it's only 5-6 blocks) and neared the hospital he heard a voice say, "I will not only take her, I am going to take them both today." At some point early, Jeff got the opportunity to visit with our doctor in the hall (out of my view, hearing, etc) privately. He looked Craig in the eye and said, "Craig you do everything humanly possible in there today." We are personal friends w/ Dr and his family and they have 8 children too. Craig confirmed this at Cael's first well child and also shared with me that he believed it strong enough that he called Angie (his wife) and asked her to pray (I'm sure she already was, but he had some specifics now). After Cael was born, I recall Craig making some comment (that at the time I did not understand the seriousness of), "When we get this placenta delivered I will feel better." I know in my 36wk appt he had a student w/ him and he kept going on the the student about the higher risk of hemorrhaging in a grand-multip momma....so I knew there was some basic concern, but did not realize what Jeff's feeling/sense was combined with the basic risk. I also remember Craig insisting on a bolus of pitocin right after birth (along with the IV I already had going). Jeff also insisted on leaving the darn IV in and running pit until the entire bag was gone (mind you, again I had no idea why). Now let me add this.....for weeks before 'd' day my anxiety climbed. Yes, I have done this many times before and unmed most times. But the reality of those 2 contractions and the pushing/delivery, just had me freaked out. I NEVER ONCE from the time I got up on Oct 23, through delivery, NEVER ONCE did I feel anxious about anything. It was absolutely, positively the most PEACEFUL, CALM, NON-CHAOTIC birth I have ever had. Coincidence? NO WAY! The POWER OF PRAYER! And even more than that, the power of a praying, loving husband. Socks on the floor? Annoying. Toilet seat up? Annoying! Cap off the toothpaste? ANNOYING. Dishes left by the tv? ANNOYING!!!! But, so what?!?!? Bottom line is he would give his life for me and loves me and WANTS me here with him and the day that Cael was born, Jeff fought....he fought for my life! Beyond the petty day to day things that annoy us in life, there is a much deeper fabric of life that means a gazillion times more than anything else.

And now you know......the rest of the story!

2009-11-02T16:21:00.000-06:00

My dear husband used to always tell me he wanted 5 boys. I always countered with, "I want a girl first then you can have your boys." And so, our family began.... pregnancy #1 - I said, "girl" - around 34wks it was determined baby was laying transverse and after I cried my eyes out for hours because a c-section was my worst fear, I finally resigned myself to the fact that the ultimate goal was a healthy baby - go for 37wk OB appt with plans to set a date for c-section and the dr says, "I think this baby flipped! I have done 8 ultrasounds today, let's do another." Then we learned that not only had baby indeed flipped to head down (YIPPEE) but also that baby was a GIRL! pregnancy #2 - I said, "boy" - routine u/s (with same OB as #1) dr thought 'boy' - then OB left his practice and the state so we had to switch OB's and the new OB wanted to do his own u/s and he said, 'girl' (with a lot of confidence I might add) - I just walked out and told Jeff, "He is wrong." Sure enough, at delivery it was announced baby #2 was a BOY! pregnancy #3 - I said, "boy" - routine u/s (this time w/ and u/s tech as we were now back in Pella with family doctor) - Jeff all of a sudden bumps my arm and says, "LOOK, it's a boy!" Sure enough! pregnany #4 - I said, "I have changed my mind, I think I would like another girl now." hehehe and, yes, baby #4 is a GIRL pregnancy #5, #6 AND #7 - I said, "girl" and yep all GIRLS! Jeff walked through the house one day and nonchalantly said, "When we have another boy I know what his name will be and you won't like it." **notice he said "when" not "if"!?!?!? Now as to the name thing, well that's another story pregnancy #8 - I said, "This is that boy" - Jeff was sure of it also. Jeff was so sure that he refused to go to the u/s because he did not want to be tempted to peek. He was also sure I could not keep a secret for that many months so I would not peek either. Well, he was wrong on that part - I did peek AND he had no idea that I did until after #8 arrived (and honestly he probably still would not know if not for Caleb making a discovery and also keeping the secret for months until Jeff showed up at school to tell him he had another brother and Caleb said, "I knew he was a boy" LOL Soon after, Jeff began to say we were done. That we would not have any more biological children. I said, "I am not saying you are wrong, but I do feel strongly there is one more little girl and then we will be done." We did not argue or fret about it either way because we long ago let go of what little control we think we can have in that area anyway. So we lived contentedly where we were, enjoying our larger than normal family with 8 children. Early March, 2009 I was sure I was pregnant again, but I did take a test - more as proof for Jeff than anything. Now there is a funny little tradition in our town that involves using chocolate chip cookies to announce a new pregnancy. So I bought a package of Chips Ahoy, carefully tucked the positive test in it, wrapped it with a cute note, and left it on the kitchen island for Jeff to find when he came home for lunch. After he opened it all I said, "This is our little girl and we are done." Just matter of fact, not sad, not happy, just simply this is how it's supposed to be. And Jeff not only believed me, but agreed. In what I thought was more confirmation, my edd was to be October - the very month when my maternal grandmother would turn 91. AND the middle name we have had picked out for many years is also my grandmother's middle name. I had an early u/s to determine dates and I came home that day and said to Jeff, "We better go to the hospital with two names because I am pretty sure I saw boy parts." Now that shocked both of us! Because I am 'old' according to the OB gods I get a consult and higher level u/s with the High Risk OB around 20wks. This time Jeff did go along (at my request) and we had no plans to peek. But our baby had another plan as HE showed ALL and there was no way we could miss that baby #9 was a BOY! We are not at all disappointed - in fact we could not be more thrilled with him! We both do stop to wonder what this means though..... I still feel strong that 'she' is to be part of our lives (we even know her name). We do not know when or how - but we are both now certain 'she' is to be. It maybe through another pregnancy I have or it may be through adoption. The one thing we are very certain of is that our LORD Jesus Christ is in control and we rest contentedly in that.

Cael's Arrival

2009-10-24T22:23:00.000-05:00

Most of this was written the evening of Cael's birth (10/23). I can not tell a lie - I have known since my 38wk appt on Oct 12 that if we made it to today, I would be induced. I kept holding out hope that I would go on my own, but it wasn't meant to be. We were told to arrive at 6:30 am - walked in through ER and the lady said, "Wow, you were supposed to be here at 6:30 and it's 6:30" :lol: Here STUPID comment for the day was, "When are you going to stop having these babies?" Got upstairs to OB, into a room, changed into my 'lovely' gown, had Jeff take a couple last pics (why, i'm not sure :lol: ). The night nurse did some vitals, put monitor on, and put in my IV. Then shifts change at 7. I was hoping beyond hope I would get Karen as my nurse as she was a true angel when I had Jarah and my nerves weren't about as frazzled this time as with Jarah so I really wanted Karen. That wasn't meant to be either and we got Marcia. Which is fine - Marcia has been w/ us for (we think) 4 of the 6 that have been delivered in Pella and we really like her. 7:20 pitocin started on 2 7:52 - dr broke my water 9:00 - dr checked me "still the same" and I thought "oh crap it's going to be afternoon before this kid gets here" -- after this I went potty and Marcia asked if I wanted to walk awhile, she would let me stay off monitors for 15-20min! I walked around and what contractions I was having(light ones to me) STOPPED (or at least it seemed like it). I got back into bed, hooked up monitors and laid on my left side (I can't stand staying on my back) and decided to read a book to just take my mind away. That lasted about 10 pages then I drifted off. ** sometime in here the pitocin level was upped to 4 just before 10 - I went potty again and consciously decided to lay on my right side - why was this conscious? Because in the past they have had me flip at some point to get that last little bit to melt away on one side or the other...so onto my right side I went 10:00 - things started to pick up and I was relaxed but breathing through contractions; dr came and checked me, "5-6" and as he was leaving, "It won't be long now Lisa" to which I thought, "OH CRAP, this is really going to happen now!" I started to quiz the nurse, "How long does the sublimace take to kick in?" "It works fast." "And how long does it last?" "About an hour." "And how long can we push it until it's too late?" "We aren't supposed to give it within an hour of delivery." "So you are really saying it's already too late!" The reality was I in no way needed it at that point, I just knew how fast things go and thought I might get ahead of it since my nerves were absolutely frazzled. 10:15ish - I said to Jeff and Marcia, "I know I will like you both later, but right now I do NOT like you at all for not letting me have that stuff!" :lol: It was about this time that I started to get sweaty (Jeff asked if I wanted a cool rag cause usually I do, but I refused) - I noticed it mostly on my hands. Jeff was AWESOME staying on my left (at this point behind me), one hand kind of rubbing my shoulder (just the right amount that I welcomed it and it was not annoying) and the other hand on my hip - it was comforting. About now Jeff said to Marcia, "You need to call Craig [the dr]." Marcia kinda thought, "Why? Well, if he has to wait for her to push then ok" and went to call the dr. Dr came right back (offices are connected to hospital w/ a back hallway)....checked me (while still on right side) and said, "We need to be ready." They started breaking down the bed, and were trying to convince me to roll onto my back and get legs up. This of course is also about the time I started saying, "I don't want to do this!" Somewhere in here Angie showed up (nursing supervisor who would be baby nurse) - she never bothered earlier this morning or even at this point to introduce herself and then Marcia says, "Oh I guess Angie brought a student with her." I said, "OH NO, PLEASE DON'T" - but no one seemed to catch that I was talking about the student nurse. Dr told me I could push, I said, "Really?" :lol: So two contractions later, Cael was here. When I asked how many times I pushed, no one could really say, but Dr did say, “The first couple you were only half pushing cause you were still half breathing.” I think it ended up being 3-4 (counting the half ones). I know after the first 'half one' I said,“Does he have hair?” Dr said, “Lots of dark hair.” Then after the first contraction, they had to tell me to take a break, and I said, “WHY isn't his head out yet?!?!” I think it was the next one – the real one – when he came out. And my babies do not stop to be suctioned once they start, they just slide ALL the way out! Oh and he came out SCREAMING :) Dr said, “He is officially a boy,” and helped Jeff to cut the cord, then they handed him to me. They through a digital recorder up on me also and recorded his first cry as well as me officially announcing his name.

Brief Introduction

2009-09-28T21:30:00.000-05:00

Hello all,

Welcome to my little corner of the world. I chose to call this Mommy's Mumblings - but the reality is that sometimes I yell - LOUD! Sometimes out of habit because that's just they way I grew up. Sometimes out of necessity because with 8 kids and a husband I have to in order to be heard. And sometimes, out of sheer frustration. Not an admirable trait, but it is my reality.

So what will I 'mumble' about here? Well, it could be just about anything. We have plenty of funny incidents that happen in our busy household, and I'm told that others enjoy hearing about them - so hopefully but sharing them someone will get a smile. I also like to think I have a bit of life experience and wisdom to offer. Sometimes it will be about motherhood, but do not be surprised if it is just about life in general or anything in between. I am confident that there will be more than a few posts that boldly show my relationship with Jesus Christ.

I am not good at 'promoting' or 'marketing' myself so if you would like to let people know that I am writing something they might enjoy or find worthwhile, by all means do so. If you have found me, please leave a note and let me know!

In HIS great Love,
~lisa